CHAPTER 115

"it's me, don't be afraid."

Qin Yinong's shoulder was immediately soaked with tears.

Tang Ruoyao recognized her voice.

Qin Yinong was almost in a panic, gently patting her back while clumsily comforting her in her ear, asking her not to cry.

Both of them, one crying and the other comforting, held each other without moving.

It was Guan Han who finally came out to remind them. Qin Yinong called a bodyguard over to prepare to take Tang Ruoyao away. Qin Yinong was wearing high heels and had drunk a lot of alcohol. She was unsteady on her feet and couldn't guarantee that she would be able to support Tang Ruoyao steadily. Moreover, Tang Ruoyao was in a state of extreme panic, with no strength left in her body.

But after what Tang Ruoyao had just experienced, she refused to have any contact with anyone. Except for Qin Yinong, no one else could approach her. Qin Yinong couldn't do anything else, so she half-embraced and half-carried Tang Ruoyao with difficulty. She held onto Tang Ruoyao while a bodyguard supported her, slowly making their way downstairs.

Guan Han stayed behind to handle the aftermath.

Tang Ruoyao was well-behaved throughout the journey, obediently supported by Qin Yinong, and obediently got into Qin Yinong's car parked at the hotel entrance. She took a sip of water and said, "Thank you" in a "calm" manner.

Qin Yinong was filled with anger throughout the journey. Seeing the scene in the room earlier froze the blood in her veins, and coupled with everything that followed appearing normal, she never thought that Tang Ruoyao had been drugged. In the darkness of the night, she also didn't notice the unusual expression on Tang Ruoyao's face. Her previous loss of control was gone, and she intended to put on her cold mask again. But before she could finish her sentence, Tang Ruoyao suddenly pounced on her. Caught off guard, Qin Yinong received a direct kiss.

Qin Yinong was stunned.

This time, it was different from the previous time they kissed. It was bolder and more intimate. Suppressed emotions overwhelmed her rationality in an instant, and she just stood there, unable to resist.

It was only when Tang Ruoyao's warm and sweet breath merged with her lips and teeth that Qin Yinong's rationality finally gained the upper hand. She raised her hand and firmly held Tang Ruoyao's chin, her eyebrows and eyes filled with anger. "You dare to do such a thing!"

The audacious person who was blocked from advancing looked at her with unfocused eyes, and despite Qin Yinong's hand on her chin, she stubbornly tried to get closer to her.

"Are you..." Qin Yinong's heart trembled, and she belatedly noticed the abnormally high temperature on the cheek beneath her fingertips, including the breath she had exhaled onto her face earlier, which was equally hotter than usual.

The strength in her hand loosened slightly, and Tang Ruoyao moved forward a few steps. She murmured, "Sister..."

Her cold voice became tender and sweet under the influence of the drugs, tingling to the core, causing Qin Yinong's alcohol-dulled brain to momentarily become hazy. Tang Ruoyao pulled down Qin Yinong's wrist that was blocking her, and without caring about anything, she kissed her again.

Qin Yinong closed her eyes and subconsciously responded twice before her alarm bells went off in her mind, once again restraining herself. Having been accustomed to physical labor since childhood, she had considerable strength for a woman. Even though she had been drinking, her hands were not as steady as before, and theoretically, she should have been able to subdue an ordinary girl. However, Tang Ruoyao unexpectedly possessed such great strength that Qin Yinong exerted all her might to hold her down, becoming exhausted and gasping for breath.

Qin Yinong tightly held Tang Ruoyao's wrists and sternly instructed the driver in front to start the car.

Tang Ruoyao kept struggling throughout.

Qin Yinong could barely hold her down towards the end and was taken advantage of several times.

They finally made it back to their residence with great difficulty. Tang Ruoyao was probably exhausted from causing a commotion along the way. Qin Yinong settled her on the couch, and this time, Tang Ruoyao didn't pounce on her but instead continued to hum while grabbing Qin Yinong's cold hand and pressing it against her face.

Qin Yinong looked at her with mixed emotions, seeing her treat herself like a makeshift cooling device. Her thoughts drifted away to an unknown place. It wasn't until the sensation on her fingertips felt off that Qin Yinong suddenly came to her senses, retracting her hand as if she had been electrocuted, her heart uncontrollably pounding.

The coolness that had calmed her down suddenly disappeared, and Tang Ruoyao pouted slightly, her lips red, thin, and moist. Because of thirst, her lips were partially open, revealing the redness and softness hidden within.

Not long ago, Qin Yinong had tasted it, and it was very sweet.

Her scent.

A desire for closeness surged in her heart, burning like a wildfire, causing her whole body to heat up, her eyes reddening.

Heart pounding like a drum, slowly drawing closer.

Tang Ruoyao was also approaching her, their warm breaths mingling on their lips.

The air ignited with a touch.

Qin Yinong's fingers, pressed against her side, clenched tightly, the joints turning white. No, she couldn't, she couldn't do it. She averted her gaze in a state of panic, almost unable to meet the eyes that were misty with emotions.

"I'll go prepare some water for you, take a cool bath." She hurriedly escaped into the bathroom.

The water tap in the bathtub released cold water, and Qin Yinong let the pale fingers rinse under the water, enveloped by the icy flow. Taking a deep breath, she slowly, slowly suppressed the restlessness in her heart.

Filling the bathtub would take some time, and Qin Yinong didn't dare to face Tang Ruoyao outside. Leaning against the nearby sink, her eyes stared blankly at a spot on the ground beneath her feet.

She was too focused on her thoughts to notice when Tang Ruoyao entered the bathroom at some point.

The drugs administered to her must have been quite potent. Tang Ruoyao's gaze was even more dazed than before, devoid of any moments of clarity. Approaching under Qin Yinong's cold gaze, if it were any other day, she would never dare to move. However, she was completely under the influence of the drugs, unable to discern the other person's expression and not caring in the least.

She just instinctively approached the person who could bring her relief from the raging fire.

As she was about to reach Qin Yinong, she stumbled unsteadily. Qin Yinong quickly reached out to support her, but she was pushed against the edge of the sink by the other person, causing her to groan in pain.

Tang Ruoyao found Qin Yinong's hand and tightly held it, rubbing her fingertips against the back of her hand.

Her skin was cool to the touch, and Tang Ruoyao felt much better being close to her.

While silently enduring Tang Ruoyao's increasingly bold actions, Qin Yinong guided her towards the bathtub, intending to let her calm down in the cool water. However, at the same time, her own consciousness was becoming increasingly blurred, mechanically moving forward with a determined purpose.

That night, Tang Ruoyao kissed her countless times.

Since the moment she received the message from her, Qin Yinong's tightly wound string snapped. Her chest heaved heavily, her breathing lost its steady rhythm, and she forcefully pulled back the hand she was holding.

The air went from igniting to exploding in less than a second.

Her mind was hazy, and alcohol had made her willpower as thin as paper, incredibly fragile. Qin Yinong lifted her hand and grasped the young woman's chin, taking the upper hand and kissing her fiercely and deeply.

They were like two stranded fish on the beach, mouths wide open, with only each other as a source of salvation, so they embraced each other.

The cold water in the bathtub ultimately went unused, emitting a faint cold light.

In the bedroom separated by a wall, the temperature continued to rise.

The hormones between lovers were like fuel, and Qin Yinong completely lost herself completely in Tang Ruoyao's voice.

.....

After a long time.

Tang Ruoyao lightly placed a hand on her forehead, her slightly disheveled, black hair scattered on the white pillow. She closed her eyes, her chest gently rising and falling, looking exhausted.

Qin Yinong went to the bedside to get tissues, but as soon as she stood up, Tang Ruoyao held onto her and they both fell back down.

Qin Yinong stared into her eyes and noticed that there was still no focus in them, but the effects of the drugs had partially subsided. Tang Ruoyao was no longer so eager, instead cradling her cheek and gently kissing it—the eyes, the bridge of her nose, and finally, the corner of her lips.

Qin Yinong had just escaped from the depths of the abyss, only to be caught in the trap of tenderness in an instant. Between the kisses, she murmured Tang Ruoyao's name, her voice growing weaker and gradually becoming monotonous.

.....

The bedside lamp automatically switched to a warm light, illuminating the sleeping figure on the pillow and the room that had become quiet, almost lifeless. Qin Yinong's expression was blank as she put on her robe, quietly leaving the bedroom and entering the guest room where she usually stayed.

The window of the guest bedroom was wide open, and the cold night wind filled the room.

Qin Yinong crouched in the corner of the room, hugging her knees tightly, slowly curling up. She bit her own arm, tears streaming down her face as she struggled to breathe.

The next morning at five o'clock.

A buzzing sound shook her back to consciousness. 

Qin Yinong's gaze slowly shifted to her phone on the floor. She blinked her dry eyes and seemed to carefully contemplate for a moment before sluggishly picking up the phone and unlocking the screen.

Guan Han: [It's taken care of.]

[Thank you for your hard work.] Qin Yinong curled her stiff fingers and continued typing, [Come pick me up, I'm at Tang Ruoyao's place.]

Guan Han arrived half an hour later. She rang the doorbell, and Qin Yinong came to open the door.

Guan Han froze as soon as she entered.

The open collar of Qin Yinong's robe revealed a mess, with conspicuous red marks on her fair skin. Guan Han didn't initially understand what had happened and nearly lost control, blurting out a question about who had assaulted her. However, Qin Yinong remained calm, which helped Guan Han regain her composure.

Qin Yinong opened a bottle of alcohol and sat on the couch, pouring and drinking for herself.

Guan Han quietly accompanied her.

The sleeves of the robe were loose, and when Qin Yinong raised her hand, a section of her clean white forearm was exposed. The once flawless arm now bore identical red marks, causing Guan Han to avert her gaze, unable to look any longer.

Qin Yinong drank a whole bottle of alcohol by herself, then went to her room, changed her clothes, and put on a long-sleeved white shirt and black pants. She meticulously buttoned up the collar of her shirt to the top.

Qin Yinong's eyes were indifferent, her voice devoid of any fluctuation as she asked, "Can you tell?"

Guan Han paused, realizing what she was asking, circled around her, and shook her head, saying, "I can't tell."

Qin Yinong made a sound of acknowledgment and stood by the floor-to-ceiling window in the living room, waiting.

She waited until the horizon revealed a pale light, and she waited for the girl sleeping peacefully in the quiet room to wake up.

Around nine o'clock, she brought a glass of water, turned the handle of the master bedroom door, and entered.

Tang Ruoyao was already awake, sitting by the bedside. When she saw Qin Yinong enter, her gaze fixed directly on her, a hint of embarrassment and a hidden anticipation in her eyes.

"Sister..." She uttered the word but then hesitated, her lips trembling, swallowing the rest of the word. The affection in her eyes became more apparent, no longer concealed.

Qin Yinong put the water down and stared at her without blinking.

Perhaps it was her gaze that reminded the other person of the tumultuous night they had spent together. Suspicion colored her cheeks, her eyes slightly lowered, and she murmured, "Thank you," in a soft, barely audible voice.

"You're welcome." Qin Yinong heard her own cold voice echoing in the bedroom, "I just dislike others touching my things."

Tang Ruoyao suddenly looked up, her eyes filled with disbelief.

Qin Yinong stared back at her expressionlessly, her eyes filled with intense disgust.

Tang Ruoyao never received a response or explanation from her, and the emotions in her eyes gradually turned to hurt.

In the end, she uttered a suppressed sob, saying, "I'm sorry."

Qin Yinong left the room without looking back.

An unexpected accident had completely transformed their relationship.

"Ah Li," a nickname Qin Yinong gave her, is a nickname for a cat. She no longer called her by her name, constantly reminding her of her status as a pet, clearly delineating the boundaries between them.

Sometimes, Qin Yinong wondered if they would have drifted apart gradually if not for that accident. Perhaps they would have, or perhaps they wouldn't have. Fate always liked to play jokes on her. Who knew when it would trip her up and leave her battered and in disgrace.

After four years of entanglement, the two of them had gone in circles but couldn't separate. Instead, they found themselves in the current situation, a mess that couldn't be untangled.

It was a quarter past twelve. Qin Yinong stood up and opened a bottle of alcohol. The amber liquid poured into the glass along the rim. She didn't want to get drunk. It wasn't good for her body to be frequently intoxicated. She couldn't let her body deteriorate. After taking a few sips, Qin Yinong closed her eyes and tried to fall asleep.

Perhaps burdened by heavy thoughts, her mind felt heavy, and she didn't dream all night.

She was awakened by a gentle touch on her cheek in the morning. She slowly opened her eyes, feeling the soreness between her eyebrows from lack of sleep. It took a while for her to focus, and she saw Qin Jianing standing in front of her.

Qin Jianing held her mother's face in her small hands, her eyes forming crescents. "Good morning, Mom."

"Good morning," Qin Yinong mumbled with a nasal tone, reaching out to kiss her daughter's little hand.

"When did you come home last night?" the child spoke in a sweet and childish voice.

"Around eleven o'clock."

"I went to bed at nine."

"Mm, you're a good girl."

"Grandma told me just now that you came home. I thought she was lying to me."

Qin Yinong smiled and said, "Why would she lie to you?"

Ningning pouted and whispered, "She always tells me that you'll be back soon, but 'soon' takes so long. I waited from morning until evening, and you still didn't come back."

"I'll criticize Grandma about it later."

"Mm," Ningning nodded seriously, "It's not right for Grandma to lie."

"Ningning is right." Qin Yinong booped the tip of the child's nose.

"No, I'm not," the little girl became shy. She held Qin Yinong's hand and lowered her head, using her finger to pinch one by one, asking, "Mom, how long will you stay this time?"

"I'll stay for one more night."

Just one more night, and the little girl's face drooped. She pursed her lips, then adjusted herself and said, "Then you must be home when I come back from school this afternoon, okay?"

"Sure," Qin Yinong's eyes and eyebrows curved.

"Pinky promise."

Qin Yinong extended her pinky finger and earnestly made a pinky promise with her.

"Does Mom want to have breakfast?"

Qin Yinong had a headache and was still sleepy, so she shook her head. "Mom wants to sleep a little longer. You can have breakfast with Grandma."

Ningning tilted her head and said, "Okay then."

She kissed Qin Yinong's cheek, and Qin Yinong kissed her back.

Ningning left.

Qin Yinong closed her eyes.

Before she could fall back asleep, Ningning returned cautiously, carrying a tray from the other end of the hallway. She walked to the door, bent down to place the tray on the floor, reached for the doorknob, turned it down, opened the door, and used her shoulder to push it open while holding the tray.

Ningning woke Qin Yinong up.

Qin Yinong blinked and sat up, seeing the breakfast on the bedside table and the little girl panting, leaning against the edge of the bed.

Qin Yinong: "???"

This breakfast couldn't be...

Ningning spoke in a soft and gentle voice beyond her years, "Skipping breakfast is not good for your health. I brought it for you. Eat it and then you can go back to sleep."

Qin Yinong's eyes flickered with various emotions.

She got up and rubbed Qin Jianing's arms and legs, asking, "Are you tired?"

Ningning shook her head, her smile blossoming. "Not tired."

It was a long way from the kitchen to the second floor, and they had to climb the stairs. It was quite a task for a three-year-old to carry a heavy tray for such a long distance. Qin Yinong lifted her up and sat her on her lap, asking, "Did you have breakfast?"

"No."

Qin Yinong used chopsticks to pick up a custard bun from the plate and brought it to Ningning's lips.

Ningning hesitated between "This is for Mom, I can't eat it" and "Mom is feeding me, and I really want to eat." She didn't open her mouth for a while.

Qin Yinong spoke softly, "Go ahead and eat. Mom can't eat so much."

Only then did Ningning open her mouth and took a small bite. She ate with refined manners, taking a small bite and keeping the custard filling in her mouth, slowly chewing. Seeing Qin Yinong's unwavering gaze on her, she shyly smiled and nestled into her embrace, feeling very shy.

After the mother and daughter enjoyed their warm breakfast time, Qin Yinong lost the desire to go back to sleep. She held Ningning's hand and came downstairs. Ji Shulan had already finished breakfast and was tidying up the dining table.

"Mom, I'll accompany you to take Ningning to school later."

"Okay," Ji Shulan responded, taking the tray she brought down and heading into the kitchen.

Qin Yinong followed her inside.

She glanced outside and saw Qin Jianing happily packing her little backpack. Qin Yinong asked Ji Shulan, "How did the issue the teacher mentioned last time go?" She was referring to the gossip about Ningning.

Ji Shulan placed the dishes and chopsticks in the sink, looking reluctant to discuss it. She sighed and said, "Such things can't be avoided. She doesn't have a father, and we can't magically give her one. She will understand when she grows up." She also looked out through the glass door. "Look, she's happy now that you're back, she's smiling more than usual."

"Has she been unhappy lately?"

"I... don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know?"

"It's just that she's not significantly different from before. She's well-behaved and obedient, and she laughs when we play together. But she's increasingly fond of being alone. That study upstairs has become her territory. Every time I go in, she's reading, but she's so little, she can't even recognize all the characters. I don't know what she finds so fascinating."

"I'll go take a look later."

Qin Yinong came out of the kitchen, her gaze sweeping over the study room's door.

The two of them accompanied Qin Jianing to school together. As usual, Qin Yinong stayed in the car while Ji Shulan handed Qin Jianing over to her teacher. The school gate was crowded with parents, some children clung to their parents, wailing and refusing to enter the school gate, their faces covered in tears. The parents were sweating in panic, and the teachers were doing their best to handle the situation.

Qin Yinong looked at Ningning, who was holding her teacher's hand and bidding her grandmother goodbye in an exceptionally well-behaved manner. It was hard to imagine that she had such a side. According to Ji Shulan, she had been like this since the first day she sent Qin Jianing to kindergarten, showing no signs of discomfort.

Ningning started attending kindergarten at an early age, just two and a half years old. Was she really not experiencing any discomfort? Or was she mature enough to suppress her true nature at such an early stage?

Qin Yinong's eyes filled with confusion. Ningning had already gone inside with her teacher, wearing a snow-white princess dress, shiny little leather shoes, and her long hair flowing. Even from behind, she stood out among the group of children.

Suddenly, she turned her head and vigorously waved her hand in the direction of the car window.

Qin Yinong was taken aback but instinctively waved back, even though the other party couldn't see her.

Following the direction of her gaze, the teacher who was with Ningning turned back and curiously asked, "Is Ningning waving to her grandma?"

Ningning remained silent for two seconds and said, "Yes."

The teacher asked, "Reluctant to leave your grandma?" She saw the child's eyes suddenly turn red without warning, so she crouched down and gently touched her soft hair, comforting her, "Your grandma will come to pick you up in the afternoon, very soon."

Ningning replied, "Hmm." She said, "Teacher, let's go."

The child's figure disappeared completely, and Qin Yinong inexplicably felt a bit of a sore nose.

She hadn't given this child enough love.

The journey back home was unusually silent. Qin Yinong unlocked her phone and replied to the messages she had received since last night, replying to each one until the last message before going to bed.

Tang Ruoyao: [Good night]

Qin Yinong's phone screen stayed still on the messaging interface for a long time, then automatically went black. She lightly tapped her fingertip, lighting up the screen again, and clicked on the person's profile picture, entering their Moments. It was just a casual click, but she saw that this person, who hadn't posted anything for ages, had updated a new post.

7:05 AM.

[Airport (Waiting Lounge Photo)]

Qin Yinong and Tang Ruoyao don't have many mutual friends, so this circle of friends appears empty, giving a sense of desolation.

Qin Yinong began to stare at this circle of friends, while Ji Shulan's puzzled gaze kept coming over, but she didn't notice.

"Beep beep."

"Hmm?" Qin Yinong subconsciously flipped the phone screen and placed it on her lap, raising her head. "Mom, what's up?"

Her reaction was a bit exaggerated, and Ji Shulan couldn't help but think more. At her age, the only thing she could worry about for her children was their lifelong matters. Ji Shulan tactfully asked, "What are you looking at?"

"A... news." Qin Yinong made an excuse.

Although Ji Shulan wasn't as proficient in electronic devices as young people, her eyes were still sharp, and she clearly saw it was the WeChat interface. She couldn't help but have a bold guess and cautiously asked, "Do you... have someone you like?"

Qin Yinong remained silent.

Ji Shulan couldn't contain her excitement and approached, her eyebrows and eyes filled with joy. "Really?"

Qin Yinong felt annoyed and indifferent. "This is not something you should worry about."

Ji Shulan looked embarrassed, twisting her hands awkwardly and took a step back, stammering, "I'm sorry."

Seeing her uncomfortable, Qin Yinong softened her expression and said, "What I mean is, you should live your own life and not worry about me."

Jishulan lowered her eyebrows and murmured to herself, "You're my daughter. How can I not worry about you?"

"Mom." Qin Yinong suddenly spoke up.

Ji Shulan raised her eyes in surprise.

"No matter who I like, do you have any objections?" Qin Yinong looked into her eyes and asked.

Ji Shulan shook her head. "Mom only wants you to be happy."

"Even if it's...her." Qin Yinong's throat moved, but in the end, she swallowed those words.

"Him? What about him?" Ji Shulan asked eagerly.

[Unlike he/him and she/her in English, spoken Mandarin does not identify the gender of the person because both pronouns sound exactly the same.]

"Not much." Qin Yinong took a deep breath and returned the phone to the main screen.

While she didn't say anything, Ji Shulan expressed her attitude, saying, "As long as you don't break someone else's family, whoever you like, Mom supports you without any hesitation."

Qin Yinong remained silent, curling her fingers at her side.

To be honest, whether her mother supported her or not didn't affect her at all. She was just surprised that she had said those words to Ji Shulan. Was she... wavering?

......

Qin Yinong took a leave of absence, and Tang Ruoyao spent the whole day resting in the hotel. She endured from noon until evening, periodically opening the communication apps that had Qin Yinong's contact information. It was expected that there was no message from her. Tang Ruoyao was just considering how she should contact her and what to say.

She decided to call directly.

Before pressing the number, her heart was beating fast, afraid that Qin Yinong would reject the call.

"Hello."

The woman's soft and clear voice flowed into her heart like a gentle spring.

"Senior Qin." Tang Ruoyao immediately stood up straight, her voice unintentionally tense.

Qin Yinong held the phone with one hand, closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and waved to Ningning, who was playing with building blocks. Ningning obediently came over and called out, "Mom."

The sound transmitted through the phone, a child's voice, simple and soft. Tang Ruoyao's expression turned blank, and she lost her words.

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