CHAPTER 114
Tang Ruoyao refused the tissue silently offered by Xin Qian, took a deep breath, and composed herself, despite the turmoil in her heart. She dialed a number to Qin Yinong.
"Sorry, the number you have dialed is switched off..."
Even though she was mentally prepared, hearing the cold mechanical voice made Tang Ruoyao's eyes well up with tears once again.
She ended the call, clenched her hands tightly on the edge of the balcony, her heart pounding irregularly. She held back her tears. After calming down slightly, she called Han Yuping again.
They were supposed to return to the original filming location tomorrow, and Qin Yinong had left without saying goodbye today. She should have informed Han Yuping.
Han Yuping answered and said, "She took leave and went home."
Tang Ruoyao unconsciously made a surprise sound.
Han Yuping: "Didn't she tell you?"
Tang Ruoyao paused, pretending to be surprised and joyful, and said, "Ah, she did tell me. She sent me a message, but I didn't pay attention. I only realized after you mentioned it." Then she asked, "When did she leave?"
Han Yuping: "Didn't she mention it in her message to you?"
Tang Ruoyao: "I went out for dinner with my manager in the evening. She sent me a message at 5 o'clock."
Han Yuping: "Oh, then it's similar to the time she told me. Her flight was at 8 o'clock in the evening, so it must have just taken off."
Tang Ruoyao: "Thank you, Director Han."
There was a moment of silence from Han Yuping's end, and he asked, "Did she really tell you?" The two of them often had conflicts on set, so Han Yuping had to doubt the authenticity of her words.
"She did."
"Well then." Han Yuping said, "If there's anything you can't solve, you can come to me."
"Thank you, Director Han."
"No need to thank me. Go to bed early."
Tang Ruoyao hung up the phone and stood in front of the window for a long time.
Since Tang Ruoyao returned, Xin Qian had been silently following her, afraid that something might happen to her. Now, as Tang Ruoyao stood still, Xin Qian also stood there, but standing for a long time was tiring. Xin Qian rubbed her lower back with her hand.
Tang Ruoyao turned her head unconsciously and saw Xin Qian stretching and loosening her muscles with a grimace. She couldn't help but curl her lips and gently said, "You should go back and rest."
Xin Qian shook her head.
As Tang Ruoyao's assistant, and an assistant who couldn't do much, Xin Qian could clearly see that Tang Ruoyao was not in a good state. If she went back like this, Xin Qian would feel guilty.
Tang Ruoyao: "You won't be able to help much by staying here."
Xin Qian blurted out, "I can accompany you. If you want to cry, I can lend you my shoulder."
Tang Ruoyao burst into laughter.
"I don't want to cry."
"But..." Xin Qian whispered, "Why did Qin Yinong leave without saying goodbye to you?"
Tang Ruoyao's eyes suddenly became sore. Her assistant really was as silent as ever.
Tang Ruoyao: "If you don't go downstairs and rest, I'll deduct your salary."
Xin Qian hurriedly ran off.
Tang Ruoyao went back to her room, took her own pajamas, occupied Qin Yinong's room, took a shower alone, and came out to face an empty bed without Qin Yinong. She checked the flight from the local area to the capital online. It was scheduled to depart at 8 o'clock and land at 10:30. At 10:20, she sent a message.
.....
"Qin Jie?"
Qin Yinong looked up, and her phone screen was lit up.
"The flight is about to take off." Guan Han's voice and the reminder from the cabin broadcast sounded at the same time. "It's time to turn off the phone."
Qin Yinong looked down at the silent WeChat messages, her expression gloomy and uncertain.
It was her who left without saying goodbye, and she knew that Tang Ruoyao was still out having dinner with her manager. Until the last moment before takeoff, she subconsciously hoped to receive a message from Tang Ruoyao.
Anger, questioning, anything would do.
Even though she hadn't figured out how to respond to her yet.
She long-pressed the volume and lock buttons, and with a swipe of her finger at the top of the screen, the phone screen finally went completely dark.
The lights on the airport runway were scattered, and the plane swiftly taxied along the runway. The body momentarily tilted backward, the heart felt weightless, and the ground grew farther away. Countless people and buildings turned into distant tiny dots, marking the end of this short-lived dream.
The flight attendant gently asked what she would like to drink, and Qin Yinong ordered a glass of red wine. She raised it and clinked glasses with Guan Han.
Guan Han sat next to her, with an aisle separating them. She took a sip of lemon water.
After finishing her drink, Qin Yinong suddenly remembered that she had promised a certain child in the afternoon that she wouldn't drink alcohol tonight.
A bitter smile appeared on her lips.
"I'll go to the restroom." She stood up suddenly from her seat.
Guan Han went with her and waited at the door.
Sounds of retching came from inside and lasted for a long time. Guan Han frowned.
It wasn't until she vomited up the stomach acid that Qin Yinong withdrew her index finger from her throat. She washed her hands and rinsed her mouth in the sink, pressed her lips with a tissue, and tidied her long hair in front of the mirror before finally opening the door and coming out.
Her already pale complexion became even paler, and the cabin aisle lights illuminated her ghostly white figure. She lacked color, resembling a fleeting soul.
"Qin Jie," Guan Han expressed her concern.
"I'm fine." Qin Yinong waved her hand. "Get me a bottle of mineral water."
She sat back in her seat, holding two disposable paper cups and slowly sipping the water, pushing back the sour bitterness in her throat. The mineral water was cold, and her body temperature was also icy. As the liquid entered her throat, Qin Yinong shivered slightly.
Suddenly, she missed someone's body temperature, missed the warmth of their palm holding her fingers, and the murmured words in her ear about the future.
Just one encounter had already left an indelible mark on her.
Qin Yinong unfolded the thin blanket provided on the plane and covered herself with it, gradually feeling warmth. Although not very intense, it was incredibly real, something she could forever hold in her hands. She clenched a corner of the blanket, turned off the seat light, closed her eyes, and embraced the anticipation of sleep.
She felt like she hadn't fallen asleep, yet there was no memory of the two-hour flight. When she opened her eyes, she heard the sound of the announcement, a chaotic buzzing echoing in her ears, resembling tinnitus.
She had a splitting headache. When the buzzing sound subsided, she could finally make out the announcement about the estimated arrival time and the reminder for passengers to fasten their seatbelts.
Qin Yinong raised her finger and rubbed her temple. She looked down at her wristwatch.
10:10.
She forced herself to focus on her home in the capital. Did Ningning fall asleep? She should have, right? She didn't tell Ji Shulan about her sudden return home. Both the old and the young have their own biological clocks, so Ji Shulan should have been asleep long ago.
Right, and there's Aunt Fang. Last time she called home, Ji Shulan mentioned that Aunt Fang's son-in-law seemed to have been diagnosed with something. Her daughter is busy with work, so Aunt Fang went to the hospital to take care of him for two days.
What did Ningning's teacher say last time? Something about her being talked about by classmates at school. What else was it?
She tried hard to remember, to recall, and a name still emerged in her mind.
Tang Ruoyao...
Will she be sad to find herself gone when she gets home? Will she hide and cry secretly, will she...
Once thoughts start growing, they're like wild grass blown by the spring breeze, squeezing out every other person and thing. Qin Yinong clenched the armrests of her seat until her knuckles turned white. The air in her lungs seemed to be suddenly sucked out, and she had to take deep breaths and tilt her face up to prevent the tears that had already welled up at the edge of her eyes from falling.
She's becoming weaker and weaker.
Qin Yinong self-mockingly thought.
She spent two minutes calming her thoughts, lowered her eyelids, and sat motionless in her seat.
At 10:20 PM, the plane began to descend and decelerate on the runway, ten minutes earlier than the estimated arrival time.
Qin Yinong turned on her phone, and a message popped up on the notification screen, almost at the exact moment the signal connected.
Tang Ruoyao: [Have you landed?]
The message quietly lay in the conversation box between Qin Yinong and Tang Ruoyao.
Qin Yinong didn't reply.
Then another message came.Tang Ruoyao: [Image of stars]
Followed by another.
Tang Ruoyao: [I just admired the moon on the balcony. The stars are beautiful tonight. The capital has such heavy smog, you missed it.]
Qin Yinong vigorously rubbed the edge of the phone body with her thumb, her eyes suddenly turning red.
After Tang Ruoyao sent three messages, she stopped. No anger, no questioning, no hysteria, as if her sudden departure had never happened.
She was always gentle and accommodating, even to to the point of laughing off the pain she caused.
Qin Yinong didn't think she had no heart, didn't know pain. It's just that she chose to advance with her heart exposed to the spear, never retreating.
After the heartache, there was an overwhelming sense of powerlessness.
The guilt of not knowing how to face such a person almost crushed her.
Why wouldn't she just give up?! She almost wanted to scream in her face.
Restless, she disembarked the plane, switched from the shuttle to the car, and entered the yard of her home. The phone in her pocket buzzed again: [Have you arrived home? Let me know you're safe. I'm really worried about you.]
After sending this message, Tang Ruoyao lay flat on the bed, her chest gently rising and falling, tears silently sliding down the corners of her eyes, seeping into the pillow.
She was pressuring Qin Yinong, she didn't want to, but she had no other way.
This was a game between the two of them, betting on who would soften first.
A long time passed.
She received a reply.
Qin Yinong: [I'm safe.]
As expected, Qin Yinong lost the battle.
She was always prone to softness, which is why Tang Ruoyao often found opportunities to exploit in their relationship.
While forcing herself to be heartless, she would abandon all her established principles when she saw Tang Ruoyao suffering because of her heartlessness. She tormented her own heart repeatedly. She was such a contradictory person, yet someone who couldn't help but be pitied.
Tang Ruoyao understood her, so she pitied her even more, surpassing her own feelings.
So she wasn't happy, only felt sad, and replied: [Goodnight.]
She knew Qin Yinong wouldn't respond, so she closed her eyes and went to sleep after sending the message.
Qin Yinong turned on the living room light and sat quietly on the couch, head hanging low.
Perhaps the sound outside startled the elderly person inside the house. Ji Shulan put on her clothes and opened the door, squinting her eyes as she walked over uncertainly. She spoke in an unsure tone, "Dudu?"
Qin Yinong lifted her head, her long hair partially covering her face. She raised her hand and brushed it aside, quickly adjusting her expression before her entire face was revealed. She forced a smile and said, "Mom."
"You child, why didn't you say anything when you came back?" Ji Shulan hobbled over with her lame leg, her figure a bit unsteady. "Are you hungry? Mom will make you a midnight snack."
"It's okay, I've already had dinner. I didn't want to disturb your sleep."
"I'm your mom, what's there to disturb or not disturb?" Ji Shulan asked her. "Is the filming all done?"
"Not yet, I just finished one segment. I took a leave to come home for two days, and I'll leave the day after tomorrow."
"Oh, I see..." Ji Shulan ran out of words and said, "Do you really not want to eat something?"
"Really." Qin Yinong smiled and nodded affirmatively.
"Ningning has gone to sleep," Ji Shulan looked towards the direction of the bedroom and said again.
"I know, don't wake her up. Give her a surprise tomorrow morning."
Ji Shulan moved her lips, hesitated for a while, and said, "...then you should go back to sleep early, you must be tired from the journey."
"You too, goodnight."
"Goodnight."
Qin Yinong accompanied Ji Shulan back to the bedroom and took a glance at the sleeping Ningning. When children were in their growth period, Qin Jianing had good genes. Both her parents had good figures, tall and with long legs. After not seeing her for two months, Qin Yinong felt that Qin Jianing had grown quite a bit. Her soft, jet-black hair covered almost half of her clean forehead, and she had a serene sleeping face.
Although her features resembled Qin Yinong, her temperament was more like her birth mother, elegant and refined.
Qin Yinong lowered her head and gently kissed her daughter's forehead, tucking her in and turning to leave. She walked to the entrance, closing the lights for the old and the young, and climbed upstairs alone with heavy steps.
There were four people in the Qin residence. Ji Shulan and Aunt Fang were both elderly, Ningning was a child, and they stayed downstairs with Ji Shulan at night. The activity areas for the three of them were all downstairs. Qin Yinong lived on the second floor alone, with only her own room and study. The other rooms were vacant all year round, their doors tightly closed, and the corridor was desolate and cold. The sound of footsteps on the wooden floor echoed emptily.
"Senior Qin." A sudden voice came from behind.
It was lively and uplifting, like a free little bird that seemed to immediately fly towards her and hold onto her tightly.
Qin Yinong's eyebrows twitched, and the corners of her lips unconsciously curved with joy as she turned around.
The long corridor was silent, and at the end was a partially open window.
The smile in her eyes gradually faded away.Unintentionally, Tang Ruoyao's voice resounded in her mind.
"This corridor is drafty, did you notice? I closed it tightly when I came out earlier, but there's still a draft."
"I think the window installers didn't do a good job. I have a few windows like that at home, with screens installed. The windows are hardly ever opened, and over time, the metal inside rusted. Now it's difficult to close them properly."
Qin Yinong walked over absentmindedly and inspected the window.
The house was purchased only a few years ago, and the window and door installer was responsible. When she closed it, it was shut tight, and no wind could penetrate.
But she still felt cold, a bone-chilling cold that seeped into her soul, urging her to quicken her pace. She entered the room and immediately turned on the air conditioning, then went to the bathroom for a hot shower.
She intentionally adjusted the water temperature higher, and her skin turned red from the heat. Qin Yinong showered for a while before stepping out in a thick bathrobe. She habitually went to the wine cabinet, but hesitated at her fingertips, checking the time on her phone. It wasn't yet midnight, still within today's timeframe, so she resisted the temptation and returned.
Unable to drink, not feeling sleepy, and not wanting to sleep, Qin Yinong sat at the bedside, enduring the passing time.
Less than ten minutes remained until midnight, then she could have a drink.
She clasped the collar of her robe tightly, sitting with her knees pulled up, unable to stop thinking about Tang Ruoyao. She recalled every detail since they first met, like a revolving lantern playing in her mind.
When did she fall in love with Tang Ruoyao? She wasn't clear herself. Perhaps it was when she looked up at the banquet table, resembling her former self; or perhaps it was when she brought her home, thinking she had to fulfill the duties of a lover, clumsily trying to please herself, her poor acting skills often making Qin Yinong secretly laugh in her heart, forgetting many of her unhappiness; or perhaps it was when she later saw Tang Ruoyao's affectionate gaze, triggering the same thoughts in her own heart; or perhaps...
The occurrence of love doesn't always have to be thrilling, it often takes root in subtlety and darkness. Qin Yinong increasingly focused her gaze on the young girl, observing her busyness or leisure, her concentration or distraction. She saw her lower her eyes slightly in front of her, unable to resist stealing glances, afraid that she might notice something, yet also afraid that she might not notice her intentions.
Teenage infatuation was always poetic and quite adorable.
At that time, Qin Yinong's older sister had just returned to the country, pregnant and with a withered appearance, in a pitiful state. Subconsciously, Qin Yinong didn't want to face the harsh reality and often sought refuge with Tang Ruoyao, enjoying the natural flow of their relationship.
Qin Yinong's family was in discord, and since childhood, she had only heard Ji Shulan speak of how good Qin Hongjian used to be. But all she saw was a father who was addicted to alcohol and frequently erupted in fury, making life miserable for the entire family. People's hearts are fickle, and this was a lesson she had been forced to learn since birth. Later, when Qin Luning returned to the country, it further instilled a natural fear of love within her.
She didn't expect to fall in love with Tang Ruoyao at that time, and she didn't realize it at first. The moments when she wanted to pay attention to each other, share joys and worries, and felt uneasy when the other furrowed her brows—that feeling was love.
It wasn't until they returned from the wrap-up banquet, when Tang Ruoyao pretended to be drunk and kissed her.
Her heart raced, and she almost held her chin and kissed her back.
She made an excuse to cook a sobering soup and escaped from her side.
While cooking the soup, her mind was chaotic, thinking about many things. She wondered how to talk to Tang Ruoyao, whether to pretend ignorance and avoid the topic, or to have an open and honest conversation with her. She thought that she might need some time to carefully consider this matter.But she didn't have time.
Qin Luning suddenly passed away, having committed suicide by cutting her wrists.
It felt as if her world had collapsed, and darkness pervaded her days. There was no harbor for her to find solace in anymore. She left behind a newborn daughter, and Ji Shulan spent her days in tears. Qin Yinong didn't have time to grieve, nor did she have the chance to wail and cry. She immediately took up the responsibility of holding the family together.
Her budding feelings were suppressed by the weight on her shoulders, strangled in the cradle.
Taking care of Ji Shulan until her old age and raising Ningning to adulthood became her only wishes in the latter half of her life. As for herself, she had been buried along with Qin Luning since the day of her death.
She couldn't bear the future of another person, nor could she endure the risk of losing someone again.
So, she decided not to start, so that there would be no end.
Love was her own affair. For her, loving someone was hope, it was the courage to keep living. But being loved was a burden, a shackle, an inescapable prison.
Tang Ruoyao sensed her growing indifference, her eyes dimmed, and she gradually gave up her attempts to test the waters. At that time, Qin Yinong was already an international film queen, and she thought that she could easily deceive Tang Ruoyao with her acting skills. She thought it was good, everything was going according to her wishes.
Tang Ruoyao's feelings for her weren't deep yet. She was infatuated with Qin Yinong's appearance and aura more than genuinely liking her. Given enough time, she would no longer love her. When she no longer needed to be close to her and could live well on her own, Qin Yinong would leave her and silently protect her from behind the scenes, without letting her know.
Tang Ruoyao would have her own life and someone to grow old with. She would surely have a colorful and splendid life.
Qin Yinong anticipated this, but she didn't expect the unexpected to come so soon, just a few years later.
It seemed that fate enjoyed playing jokes on her.
Three years ago, on a day with no stars or moon.
Qin Yinong was attending a social gathering outside. The table was filled with industry big shots, and she was forced to drink a lot. Despite her reputation for being able to handle a thousand cups, that day she felt dizzy and unsteady on her feet. She ended up vomiting profusely in the restroom of the club before being helped into the car by Guan Han.
Guan Han sat with her in the backseat and handed her an eye mask, telling her to rest with her eyes closed.
Qin Yinong's headache from drinking made it impossible for her to fall asleep. Her mild neurasthenia worsened, and her ears became unusually sensitive. Guan Han's phone vibrated, and Qin Yinong impatiently took off the eye mask, her eyes filled with anger that she could barely contain. She asked sharply, "Who is it?"
Guan Han took out her phone and frowned. "It's... Miss Yao."
The rare defiance on Qin Yinong's face quickly dissipated, and her voice unknowingly softened. "What did she say?"
"I can't understand." Guan Han handed her the phone to read.
Tang Ruoyao: [Wrap-up banquet, I'm here.]
An incomplete message.
Qin Yinong pinched her brow. "Is she wrapping up today?" In order to avoid getting closer to Tang Ruoyao, Qin Yinong intentionally didn't keep track of her schedule.
Guan Han said, "Yes."
Then another message popped up.
Tang Ruoyao: [Jiu.]
Qin Yinong's eyelids twitched. Jiu? Which pronunciation? Which character?
After that, there were no more messages.
Guan Han glanced at Qin Yinong, and Qin Yinong's pupils suddenly contracted. She made a decisive decision, "Go and find out where her wrap-up banquet is and which private room she's in." Her heart raced, sweat forming in her palms. It's a rescue! A life-saving rescue!
She hoped it wasn't true, but she couldn't afford to take that risk.
Guan Han had been with her for many years and had all the necessary sources of information. Moreover, since Qin Yinong didn't pay attention, Guan Han needed to know what Tang Ruoyao had been up to in case Qin Yinong suddenly asked.
Guan Han found out the hotel where the wrap-up banquet was being held. The car made a sudden turn and raced into the night.
Qin Yinong was wearing high heels, still under the influence of alcohol. When she got out of the car in a hurry, she almost sprained her ankle. Guan Han quickly grabbed her wrist, and the two of them, accompanied by a line of bodyguards, rushed into the hotel and broke into the private room.
Qin Yinong looked around but didn't see Tang Ruoyao. Guan Han grabbed someone's arm and asked, "Where is Tang Ruoyao?"
The person hesitated and said, "She went out with XX."
XX was the name of the person who drugged Tang Ruoyao.
"Where did they go?"
"To..." The person didn't want to answer, but seeing the dark and dangerous expression on Qin Yinong's face, with her deep and intense black eyes brewing a storm, they couldn't help but shrink their neck and honestly say, "To the room upstairs."
"What floor?" Qin Yinong asked with a menacing face.
"Six..." The person swallowed nervously, "Sixth floor."
Guan Han let go of the person.
A crowd surged forward and then receded like a tide.
The hotel manager was frustratingly slow, taking forever to provide any information. Qin Yinong couldn't wait even a second longer and ordered the bodyguards to search room by room along the corridor, almost kicking open all the doors on the entire sixth floor.
Sounds of dissatisfaction and curses echoed through the corridor, causing chaos, but Qin Yinong paid no attention.
She cleared the way, and two muscular bodyguards simultaneously kicked open the door in front of them, finally finding the person.
When Qin Yinong saw the scene before her, her eyes almost burst with anger, and she felt the urge to kill.The unfamiliar man on Tang Ruoyao was furious at the intrusion and started shouting, but the well-dressed bodyguards immediately threw him off. Qin Yinong took a few steps forward but suddenly slowed down, stopping in her tracks. She suddenly felt a bit afraid but didn't know what she was afraid of.
Tang Ruoyao had a distinct palm print on her face, and her fair cheek was swollen. She didn't seem to recognize Qin Yinong and murmured, "Thank you." After a pause, tears welled up in her eyes as she said, "Save me."
Qin Yinong couldn't hold back any longer. She quickly approached, took off her coat, and draped it over the young woman. With all her strength, she embraced her tightly. Her eyes were bloodshot, and she trembled all over from fear. Her lips quivered, and she struggled to suppress her sobbing as she managed to utter a few complete words.
"It's me, don't be afraid."
Don't be afraid.
I've come to save you.
Author's Note:
This is a memory from three years ago. Please note that I wanted to finish writing this night's events, but too many things happened that night.
Continued tomorrow~PS: Yao Yao's perspective is in Chapter 56.
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